Friday, December 03, 2010

I Hope They Made More Money Than I Did

If this is any indication how competent our government is, we are SO FUCKED.
No wonder the Repubs want to get their hands on our Social security, it would be too fucking easy. Billions of dollars that we now don't know who gets what, if we even live that long, but you are more concerned with what porno sites I am looking at?

Jesus fucking christ, what a bunch of fucking DUMB ASSED, STUPID SONSABITCHES!

Yeah baby, Bookmark this site I was just at, look at those cans!

Ohh baby, want to get on an air plane? Hold still or we will put you on a No Fly List as a Domestic terrorist.

Bring me that little boy.

You, with the big breasts, you need to come over here for some special lovin', I mean, "enhanced  body  security search", or what we used to call, give you a couple of bucks over a beer while you gyrated around a brass pole on a Saturday night, except there was this big dude in the corner who would wrench your shoulder out of it's socket as he threw your ass out on the curb if you dared to touch that lady.

Now they molest little kids in the name of "Security"

Keep your Social "Security" Number straight? You ARE, a Domestic terrorist for even suggesting we don't have our shit together.

I always marveled that my brother and I finally had to get a Social Security card at the same time. I believe I was twelve and he was nine.
 When we finally got them, back in the early seventies, his number was way the hell different than mine.
To this day, after all these years, I still have my original card.
Too bad, they won't accept it.

They wouldn't let you encase it in plastic then.

 I have lost my wallet a couple of times since then but I got lucky and got it back.

You can't read the top, bottom or sides. What used to be a rectangular card is now pretty much an oval.

You can still see most of my name and the number is still right there in the middle but I can bet they would not accept it any more.

I could be a Domestic Terrorist with a thirty eight year old Social Security card, still in my possession, from all those years ago.

Have a nice fucking day, bitches.

I don't need a fucking Birth Certificate, I have that. Not that I don't have a birth certificate, I could come up with that too.
I still have a wallet sized copy of my High School diploma, so does my GF., hers, not mine.

They were a popular way to dig ya for a few bucks more way back when.

Little did they know, we still have them.

I did lose my Class ring on a construction job thirty years ago and I ain't getting another one, who the fuck cares at this point?

So, we now have twenty million people in this country who have the same fucking Social Security numbers.  One in seven. They are worried about WIKI LEAKS?

Are You Fucking Kidding Me?

 Get yer fucking heads out of yer fucking asses and use all those god damn email and cell phone records you have been keeping, along with those Super Computers you keep bragging about and figure this shit out!

For fucks sake! I have better odds at hitting the mother fucking lottery!

It is readily apparent that our valued Federal employees have had no way to double check the paper work they have been submitting for the last forty fucking years.

Sign the papers and we will send you this cute little card you can call all your own.

I still have mine, I think I need to go see who else still has theirs. This could take a while.

All I can hope is that that yearly statement I get from SS hasn't been taking into account all my new found friends.


  1. I still have my original card and birth cirtificate. Never got the wee diploma, though. I don't figure the SS will do me any good, anyway - haven't been able to hold a proper job for any length of time (being nuttier than a Claxton fruitcake makes it difficult), so I've paid into it but not enough to ever collect. Won't make much difference, anyway - it'll be tapped long before I'm old enough to collect.

    Meanwhile, is anyone really surprised that the whole flamin' system is cocked up??

    Shade and Sweetwater,

  2. I'm thinking about joining the Testicle Squeezer Association myself, but only if I can be in the Titty Groping Branch. I love me some titties. Big 'uns, little 'uns, it don't matter much. So long as there's some nice stiff nipples, that's what makes my sticker peck out. Nice stiff nipples to get me going... Hey baby, wanna fly the friendly skies? Lemme twist them nipples, then you can go anywhere ya want. I'll dream about you tonight sweetie pie. (Hey Fred, print me out the pornoscan of that fine ass redhead from 2:15 P.M., she had a titty hard-on from hell!)

  3. Dude, yer going about it the wrong way! Y a want to retire early, you want to be like the ignorant fuck that couldn't figure out what the hell the gay guy had with all the piercings in his dick and fucked around and fondled the fucking idiot until he jizzed in the TSA guys hand. The gay guy is in the slammer for felony sexual assault and you know damn good and well stupid ass is going out on a hundred percent mental disability.

    I hope he doesn't own any guns though.

    Fucking moron.

    He is, however, immediately and permanently, retired, with a full package.. LMAO!!!

  4. OTOH, I had to buy out of SS in order to get my full Civil Service retirement. Cost me $15,500 back in 1998 when I had no job and my retirement was on hold until I came up with the 15K-reason was I had 12 years military service and when I entered post office in 1980 I came under civil service-which at that time ment I was outside of SS,it all changed in 1982 when USPS was forced into SS system(and BTW, Texas teachers do not pay into SS, they get a state pension instead, I wonder how many large groups of people are still outside the SS system) which counted all my military time towards retirement and even seniority, so when retirement time came I had 28.5 years with military time. But I had not been told to buy out of SS back in 1980 when it would have cost lots less. Oh well, shit happens, then you die.