Make It Stop

As you may recall, I was bitching about the weather a couple of days ago. It snowed pretty good around here the day after Spring sprung.

Last night it was cold enough to freeze the windows on the car.

This morning, as I sit here scratching myself inappropriately, we have freezing fucking fog.

Fuck this.
I finally went to bed at 3 this morning, woke up at 6:45 it is now almost 8 AM and I am going back to bed.

From the looks of it outside, there will be no change when I wake up again.

We had a high of 39 the other day.
I am so looking forward to Summer.

Just for fun, night before last I woke up in the middle of the night needing to use the bathroom and while staggering around in the dark I managed to smack my knee cap on the dresser real good.
Damn, that fucker is sore, limped around all day at work. The whole knee cap is a nice shiny red, hasn't even turned colors yet.

Enough bitching, lights out.

Thanks fer stopping by.
Maybe I will have something more interesting later.

I Loves My Wife.

We just had a short exchange, "I love you"," I love you too." she says

I look at you when you aren't paying attention, she says the same thing back.

Fucking stalker.
She even gets in my under wear drawer without my knowledge.
Guys go to jail for that shit.

I do have to admit my under wear is clean and all my socks match now.
She makes the bed every day and makes sure my narrow ass is fed on a regular basis too.
Clean towels and having to actually brush my teeth every morning are rituals I am getting used to.

She is a good woman and I am a damn lucky motherfucker she puts up with my ass.
She says don't ever forget it either.

She even laughed when I told her what I was posting and said "I don't give a shit".
It doesn't get better than that.
I think maybe I have met my match, God forbid that there are two of us.

Be very afraid.

My Pal Lost A Loved One Today

My internet pal Fixer from Alternate Brain Fame lost his father in law this afternoon.
He had been taking care of him and making sure he was in good shape for a while now, that is a stand up guy in my book.

The gentleman had been in declining health for some time and was battling Altzheimers at 90 plus years.

He had a massive stroke and passed away while remaining unresponsive.

God speed to him.

Fixer's job is not over by a long shot, he and his lovely wife now have the extremely painful task of making the final plans and taking care of his estate.

Please, stop by and give him and his wife some well deserved support, the lady just lost her Father today and I give her my sincere condolences. They are very good people that we could all use some more of in this world.

The First Day Of Spring

And it is snowing like a bitch outside.

Goofy fucking weather around here lately.
It is 75 degrees in Minnesota and snowing in Portland Oregon.

That's just wrong.

Your Rights Can Be Terminated

Look for yourself, The Man says so!

I hope they sue these cock suckers and the entire Chicago police department into bankruptcy.

Watch it twice, it gets a little confusing with so many people arguing.

I have one thing and one thing only to say, the fucking asshole is right, they can and will terminate every right you were born with, at will, and try to buy their way out of it when they have been found guilty of depriving you of your rights, day, after day, after day.
Your fucking taxes just go up to let these fucking assholes get away with this shit until someone does, finally sue their fucking asses off and wins, it happens all the time, in every city.
Tell me Officer Ward just stepped on his dick.

"Your First Amendment rights can be terminated if you create a scene, or whatever, your First Amendment rights have limitations."

Velcome to Amerika, peon,You, can thank the Supreme court during Ronny Raygun for that decision.

This asshole just got punked and he did it to himself.

Notice both got released after ten minutes with no charges filed.

View more videos at: http://nbcchicago.com.

Then notice some other dick told them to get out of the median after being directed there by the first said dick head.

You have no fucking rights, be very aware of that, this is proof.

Y'all need to speak English

Santorum has to be the most tone deaf motherfucker I have ever seen.

That is what he said out loud to the people of Puerto Rico.
Ninety percent of whom speak Spanish exclusively.

He was trying to dangle the carrot of them becoming the 51'st state and stuck his foot in his mouth clear to the knee. His campaign manager there up and walked away and had to be replaced with an aging, retired, Baseball player.

No surprise then that the other fucking tone deaf motherfucker walked away with all their delegates, even though they can't vote in the primary in November.

I am telling ya, this is turning into a Tee Vee series that rivals I love Lucy .

Romney skated away with all twenty delegate votes and now Frothy is getting seriously close to him being impossible to win the nomination and Newticles might as well go back to Georgia and get back to charging way too much money for speaking engagements.
Like I would waste a perfectly good dime and throw a pop bottle at his fat ass.

I told you last year that the Mormon was going to be the nominee and I am right.
He doesn't have a chance come November because the South isn't going to back him and as much fucking money that he has is already pretty much gone.
Super PACs, Koch Brothers, those notorious Corporate " people" not withstanding, the guy is fucking toast.

Kudos for stimulating the economy though.

BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!

Oh, by the way Frothy?

Nice try with the strident speeches about how porno is going to kill this country, all I can say is you are getting wound so fucking tight your eyes are starting to bulge.

Now that the republican nomination process has to move out of the South and into places where there are actually folks that can think for themselves, you might as well walk into a brick wall.

I noticed Romney declined to appear at a scheduled debate across the river in Portland.

He might actually have someone on his staff that isn't completely stupid.

The West Coast is Blue from Mexico to Canada.

No need to waste your campaign funds around here.

I don't have to deal with fucked up traffic either.

Kiss Me Twice, I'm Double Irish

That explains why I can drink more than two normal humans.

My Grand father and Grand mother were both first generation Irish Americans.
Their parents came from the Old Country in the late 1860's.
His brother and her sister also married.
Hence, I can say with some certainty that I have a pretty good dose of the green.
The Patriarchs came from a little town in County Antrim called Ballymena, it's actually on the map.
In honor of this being St. Patricks day, I thought I would leave you with my best wishes and my favorite Irish joke, there are millions of them out there.

A construction site boss was interviewing men for a job, when along came Murphy. The boss thought, "I'm not hiring that lazy Mick..." so he decided to set a test for Murphy hoping he wouldn't be able to answer the questions, and he'd be able to refuse him the job without getting into an argument.

The first question was, Without using numbers, represent the number 9. Murphy says, "Dats easy" and proceeds to draw three trees. The boss says, "What the hell is that?" Murphy says "Tree 'n tree n' tree makes nine". Fair enough, says the boss.

Second question, same rules, but represent 99. Murphy stares into space for a while, then makes a smudge on each tree. "Der ya go sir" he says. The boss scratches his head and says, "How on earth do you get that to represent 99?" Murphy says, "each tree's dirty now! So it's dirty tree, n' dirty tree n' dirty tree, dats 99."

The boss is getting worried he's going to have to hire him, so he says, "All right, question three. Same rules again, but represent the number 100". Murphy stares into space again, then he shouts, "I got it!" he makes a little mark at the base of each tree, and says, "There ya go sir. 100." The boss looks at Murphy's attempt and thinks, Ha! Got him this time. "Go on Murphy, you must be crazy if you think that represents a hundred."

Murphy leans forward and points to the marks at the tree bases, and says, "A little dog comes along and craps by each tree, so now ya got, dirty tree an' a turd, dirty tree an' a turd, and dirty tree an' a turd, which makes a hundred, when do I start my job?"

Happy St. Patricks day and if you ever find this shirt, I want it.

Enough

As anyone who has ever stopped by here knows, I can be a bit of a dick.
In real life, I am a nice fucking guy, you would be amazed, seriously.

This is my outlet for what goes through my head while I am some times gritting my teeth while being such a nice guy.

On this particular subject, the Republicans concerted effort to use their political power to turn back the clock back before the turn of the century concerning women's rights and especially women's reproductive rights, has caused me to blow a fuse for the language filter and I will start with a huge neon sign, FUCK YOU!!

That being said, I would like to say that if it weren't for women, none of these crazy fucks would be here.

Ya can't help it.



I do believe in evolution and if Frothy Mixture had been born on the West Coast, I can assure you, he would have a different outlook on life.

It seems there are some backwards motherfuckers back East and y'all need to get out the butterfly nets.
Thank goodness, The Mormon decided he has no use for Oregon and cancelled an appearance at a debate here.

Good, fuck head.


This fucking bullshit about Republicans passing laws that declare any woman wanting an abortion having to have an invasive procedure is so off the fucking charts I am wondering if the contrails in the sky might have fucked them up up big time.

Let me be clear here.
No one, and I mean NO ONE, has the fucking authority to legislate personal body invasions for any medical procedure, PERIOD.

In case you don't quite understand what I mean, if you try and pass a law that says I have to have some state sanctioned asshole stick his finger up my ass so I can get condoms, said state sanctioned asshole is going to be in need of some serious dental work, I could give a fuck what law you pass.

I break the fucking law every Goddamned day, watch me.

This wedge issue that has absolutely nothing to do with the current run for President has gotten so fucking far out of hand, I want to get my hands around someones throat.

I have had enough of you ignorant cocksuckers.

You are so adamant about your religion being such an integral part of your publicly political message and doing your damndest to shove it down the throats of everyone in this country because you happen to have a majority of your crazy motherfucking idiot, backwards assed, stupid sonsabitch,creationist Bible Thumping jack ass porn watching fellows yanking the levers of power , you are about to find out what the word Backlash means.

That's right, morons, backlash.

I Highly doubt that any of you are good at Math.

You know,that two plus two thing.

Knowingly pissing off half the population of this country, besides the rest of the world watching you do it, is precisely like the old saying of cutting off your nose to spite your face.

You people are so fucking stupid I would feel sorry for you and donate my pocket change to help someone figure out just what the fuck is wrong with you so we could fund a medical cure for your sorry asses, if it were possible.

Alas, it seems to be out of reach of current medical science, other than euthanasia.

The sun does not orbit a flat earth and yes, the reason there are so many people like you are on the planet is a physical condition involving chemical sequences called hormones, you are not exclusive to this club and your mother is no exception either.

You are, however, exclusive to having been blessed without a few key chemical sequences that involving the development of the human brain, especially the ones crucial to something called abstract thinking.

I actually feel sorry for you because you have no sense of adventure, need rigid guidelines to rule your everyday lives, have to have the same routine every fucking day and it makes me wonder if there is not yet some clinically undiagnosed relation to your thought process and autism.

Before anyone jumps my ass about that last comment, I have a 28 year old autistic boy now and I can certainly see the similarities.

In short, get your fucking Holier than thou, women are subject to my whims bullshit out of our public discourse, get the fuck with the program that we, the people, need to get back to work, quit obstructing every Goddamn thing to prove how "pure" you are and while you are at it, grow the fuck up and when ever you crazy fucks decide this is a great wedge issue in the future, stay the fuck out of my wife's pussy, the guy two states away's daughters pussy, her friends pussy and everyone else who happens to be of the gentler sexes reproductive parts, forever.
Else you will soon see a huge void in your voting results.
Those being not in your favor.

You might also experience some side effects, such as burnt toast for breakfast, no fucking breakfast or dinner and a sudden surge of that dreaded Hawaiian disease, commonly known as "LackAnookie".

Of course, that will just be the one thing to push you over the edge, again.
Burnt toast is just beyond the pale from your female indentured servant.

You will have to get a bigger wrench to super tighten her chastity belt and show her who is boss.

Take Your Crazy And Shove Off

I don't know about you but I am sick and tired of these crazy fucking bastard Republican candidates.
I don't hear a Goddamn thing come out of their mouths except wedge issues and outright insanity.

Womens birth control,anti immigration, Big Government, Tax breaks for the already obscenely rich, anti union, on and on and on.

What I am NOT hearing is just what the fuck they plan to do about putting millions of people back to work at a decent wage with decent benefits, what the fuck their foreign policies are, what the fuck they plan on doing about getting our troops home and just exactly how they plan on putting THOSE people to work or how they plan to take care of the thousands of our veterans with war trauma the rest of their lives.

I also don't see any forethought on what to do about the crooked banking industry or the crooked mortgage industry, the war on drugs, the rotting infrastructure of our country , climate change,the money losing Post office or basically any real pressing issue facing this country.
Nope, it's all about vaginas and dragging everyone back to the eleventh fucking century.
They want anyone who isn't already obscenely rich to serve as vassals to those who are and bow down to their vision of Almighty God, which by the way, isn't quite exactly on par with the teachings of a certain guy named Jesus that I had drilled into me at a tender age.
These clowns are more Old Testament the way I see it and even then, twist the message sideways.

The current crop of Republican candidates are so far out of touch with the average American as to be laughable and the blatant pandering I have seen is indeed comical to the point of parody.

I wouldn't vote for any one of these people to be in charge of putting scotch tape in the dispenser.

Get your fucking religion out of the business of this country, get your head out of your asses and out of the ladies reproductive parts and educate yourselves on actually governing in a sane manner or get the fuck off the stage forever.

Preferably the latter.

Fucknoids.

1984 Rules the World

Forget thought crime, this shit is getting serious, welcome to the future.
It's not bad enough the State can cruise through a parking lot and scan every license plate at fifteen miles an hour, or fifty, for that matter.

It's not bad enough that there are traffic camera's every where you turn, Arizona has them every half fucking mile in the middle of the fucking desert, Britain has them in bars where it is now Verbotten to wear a fucking hat or sun glasses because they demand to positively identify you sipping a motherfucking beer,they went so far as to outlaw real glass beer containers and real metal knives and forks two years ago in bars.
Now, George Orwell should be spinning about two thousand RPM in his grave, they took that concept and ran hard.

Now get this.

I can see prohibition Moonshiners circa two thousand fucking thirteen making a mint in Jolly Old England next year.

Really.

If you try to put gasoline in your car, at say, eight fucking dollars a gallon and the pump is connected to Big Brother, if you don't have car insurance, they will shut the pump off remotely.

I suppose some burly dudes in a big box van with machine guns won't be far behind to throw you on the ground to help you separate your shoulder with a knee in your neck and your elbow somewhere between you and the moon.

No fuel for you, ya piece of shit that is trying to get to work,a hospital,or God Forbid, an appointment with the motherfucking government.

Look for this to come to a fucking gas station near you soon.

When I was a kid, they gave you laundry soap, dishes, glasses or Green Stamps for doing business with them and checked your oil, cleaned your windshield and checked the air pressure in your tires just for doing business with them instead of the guy down the street. Now they are going to call the STASI on ya without lifting a finger.

Papers, Citizen?

What A Surprise

Oh yeah, I have been fucked over by some of these assholes before, I finally got wise to their shit though.
Nice to see some of them finally getting some of their own back makes me very happy.
Apparently robo-signing might not be a practice reserved solely for the foreclosure crisis.

West Virgnia's attorney general is suing two units of a debt collection company, Encore Capital Group, alleging that they robo-signed affidavits when they were trying to get default judgments against West Virginia borrowers, according to Bloomberg. For their part, Encore officials said that the lawsuit came as a "surprise," according to the West Virginia Record.

As the economic downturn pushed more Americans deeper into debt, the debt collection industry has boomed, and the sector is coming under increased scrutiny. Consumer complaints to the Federal Trade Commission about debt collectors rose 17 percent in 2010, according to USA Today. The agency last year filed a complaint against another debt collection company, this one based in California, alleging it used aggressive tactics to get borrowers to pay up -- even when they didn't owe any money.

Yeah, these fuckers need to be fined out of existence and spend a few years talking to someone named Bubba, nightly.

I'm A Grandpa, Again

My boy and his girlfriend had a baby last night.

Remind me not to fuck with this girl.
She is tough.
Two hours of hard labor with no epidural, she finally popped out a whopping nine pound baby boy.
He has some problems but in the long term I am sure he will be fine.
His blood is too acidic and his body temperature is too high so they sent the little feller to OHSU, the best, most sprawling giant assed , state of the art, hospital over in Portland.

They basically have the poor little feller in a bucket of ice, his body temperature is clear down to 95 degrees, which is hypothermic to the point of near death.
Damn that is going to be one grumpy little kid.

I feel for the little bugger.
When I was four, I had the Chicken Pox and they stuck me in the bath tub and filled it with ice.
I will remember that until the day I die, talking to my Dad, he even remembers that, told me he didn't want them to do it but apparently I was in bad shape.

Anyways, Please give a shout out to little Carter and lend a thought to a couple of exhausted kids who are going to be pretty much sleepless for the forseeable future.

He has all the necessary appendages and a head full of coal black hair from what I hear.
They are not letting friends over to see him yet, my boy told me I could come over but I declined, they have enough on their hands and I have been told it was a good thing I wasn't at the hospital last night as her Dad was a complete asshole.
My oldest daughter said that I would have punched him in the head , even the ex said he was a jerk.
Tea bagger asshole, talking politics, disrespected my son to the point my five foot two daughter got in his face. Even her mother had enough and grabbed her and walked away.

Damn proud of that little darlin' I am.

I'm sure I will meet this fuck head some where down the road, I hope they warn him about me first.
I ain't quite so patient.

It All Makes Sense Now

Someone has gone all out psycho for the last three nights in a row.
Apparently waiting for Super Tuesday.

Sleeping all day with delusions of Grandeur,

Love me now, cuddle me, play with me until I kick you to the curb or my tongue hangs out because you paid attention to me, give me everything you have.
In the mean time, you forcibly took me to a doctor against my will to have hypodermic needles stuck in my tender places and had my reproductive organs surgically removed,without my permission, I can never have children of multi ethnic heritage, especially ones that could possibly be black, brown, Calico or that really strange tabby thing from around the block either.
I Love You!


Good Lord, My cat is a fucking Republican.

35 And Counting

According to Think Progress, Rush Limbaugh has lost 35 advertisers so far after he called Ms. Luke a slut and a prostitute repeatedly last week.
I especially like this one;

JCPENNEY

"It has come to our attention that a handful of local radio stations may have played jcpenney radio spots adjacent to or during The Rush Limbaugh Show. To be clear, jcpenney is not a national advertiser of this show. We have a strict “No Run” policy in place specifically regarding The Rush Limbaugh Show.

After jcpenney confirms the facts, we will contact any local radio station that is in violation of our radio advertising parameters to ensure that our “No Run” policy is adhered to regarding this program." (via Facebook: http://thkpr.gs/Av7oq2)

Somebody is going to get fired for that.
Ol' JC been around a while.

I have no illusions that That fat fucking asshole is going to be taken off the air anytime soon but it is costing his employers money now and that is what they look at.

Of course, I never dreamed Glenn Beck would get starved out either but it really happened.

Keep up the pressure, I SOOOO want to see his fat hateful ass get thrown off of our Armed Forces Radio so bad I am fucking salivating.

Update On My Bridge Rant

I was so pissed off the other day about the complete incompetence of some local bridge designers who screwed the pooch, I sent a letter to the editor and lo and behold, it got published in the local fish wrapper!

I was pretty hot under the collar about it but didn't curse yet still got my point across that I was furious.



Good on me.

They edited it slightly to save space but I don't mind, I still got my point across rather well.

A Special Treat

I have looked for this off and on for years now.
Paul Rogers and Jimmy Page while they were together in a band called The Firm in the mid eighties.
I am watching a Bad Company concert on Tee Vee right now and spent a half hour hunting this down.

Crank it up, this is way fucking good and not something you have ever heard on the radio, sadly.

Bye Bye Rush

The rotten fucker finally stepped on his tiny little dick.

I have been waiting for this for years now.

Calling a young woman who had the temerity to speak out about birth control a slut on his national radio broadcast show just blew up in his face.
Advertisers are bailing out and he even went so far as to give a quasi apology.


I want him to have so much time on his hands that he and Glenn Beck can spend the rest of their lives reliving the phantom good old days in a very deep and very dark cave in a tsunami zone.
Hell, I will be charitable and throw in a fucking soccer ball to mediate their occasional disagreements.
I will call it Obama....

The time has come to finally rid ourselves of this poisonous fucknugget.

Mind Boggling Incompetence

Here in the Portland Metropolitan area, there has been a serious problem with traffic going between Oregon and Washington over the Columbia river for decades.
There are three bridges currently available to do this.
One was built in the seventies, I remember them building that one, they built an entire freeway with it.

The other two date to the thirties and fifties respectively.

The first of these two old draw bridges was built in the thirties and then they built the twin in the fifties.
There is a serious bottle neck they built after crossing over into Oregon where it goes from six lanes down to two.

Morons were involved, I am positive.

Now, they have been planning a 3 BILLION dollar fix, including a new, giant fucking bridge.
They have spent 140 Million dollars and many years planning it and have gone so far as to pass legislation so they can charge a toll on this as of yet non existent Bridge and freeway upgrade.

What do I wake up and see on the front page of today's paper?

The Coast Guard says it isn't high enough to let tall masted ships clearance to get under.

Let that sink in for a moment.

One business on the river alone told them they needed 125 feet of clearance and the current plan sits at 95 feet.

Morons were involved here too, I am positive.

When I got done reading the article, I was so fucking pissed off I Whipped off a letter to the editor, with out cursing mind you,calling for heads to roll and the local prosecutor to sue for redress.
By their estimates, it would take another hundred and fifty million to raise it up where it needs to be.
As we all know, on a 3 Billion dollar project, there are going to be cost over runs
and I would not be a damned bit surprised after they break ground and start construction to see it double.
This is what pisses me off the most, on a three billion dollar project to build a Mega Bridge across the biggest river West of the Mississippi, someone didn't take the time to think that there might actually be ships going up and down that river.

The incompetence is mind boggling.

Highly educated stupid fucking idiots.

Like I said, there are morons involved, I am positive.

Conservative Fuckwit, Andrew Breitbart dead at 43

It is pointless to kick a dead horse, as much as I would like to.

My condolences to his wife and children.

Another Battle Won.

HA! dirty motherfucker.

I want to hunt down and strangle the idiot cock sucker who had this fucking car before me.
Gotta, and I do mean gotta, be a fucking Crack head.

I have been fighting a severe oil leak since I got the damn thing.
Severe as in puddles under the front of the car, in my parents garage.

That shit don't fly.

I took it to my friends transmission repair shop to have a new starter put in it, that I fucked up and to chase down two leaks, one was transmission fluid and the other one was that nasty fucking oil leak.

He put it on the hoist and cleaned everything up, then had to use a crows foot socket wrench to get the transmission cooler lines off to remove the starter.
he also changed a little seal on the side of tranny where the shift linkage hooks up.

Starter in, good, fucked up ring gear, bad.

Dude only charged me forty bucks and wouldn't take the extra twenty I wanted to give him.

There will be some drinks bought later.

It works and sometime down the road, I will have him yank the transmission, this guy is GOOD he can haul that thing out in a half hour, have him throw another flex plate at it and call it good.

In the mean time, he fired it up after climbing a ladder because it was on the hoist and leak hunting we went.

I know it is at the front of the motor somewhere.
Got the flashlight out and started watching.
After about a minute, I see smoke coming out of the left front of the engine!!

Looking a little closer and being mindful of the fan spinning at a high rate of speed real near to where I am looking and I see smoke coming out of a empty bolt hole.
An empty bolt hole?
Sure as shit.
There is a bolt that is supposed to go in that hole hole on Chevy 350's that when changing the fuel pump, which is operated by a large push rod off the cam, that you can remove and thread in a two inch long bolt to hold that push rod in place so it doesn't fall out on the fucking floor, which they are prone to do. I learned this the hard way after pushing a 66 Chevy pick up across two lanes of traffic and half way up a driveway by myself in a hundred and four degree weather, by myself, at a whopping one hundred twenty five pounds.

That bolt was missing and oil was flowing out of it like an Arabian Princes dream.
One new starter, one used bolt and some skookem' putty to make double sure the motherfucker doesn't leak any more and life is good.
Two down, several more issues to deal with but I AM kicking this things ass, finally.
Stay tuned and,

Thanks fer stopping by.