Saturday, October 24, 2009

What A Blast!

As usual, I got out of the Hell hole yesterday and headed straight to a beer.
I came home and proceeded to knock down several screwdrivers .
My neighbor, the big guy, came over and I gave him a beer and a pint of vodka, just to be neighborly. We sat and chatted for quite a bit and he proceeded to get pretty fucked up.
No problem, the guy lives ten feet away and if he gets too drunk, he can just sleep where he is sitting.

We are just kind of sitting there, bullshitting and by now both of us are downright hammered and Out. Of. The.Blue.,
this guy reaches out and punches me in the face and breaks my fucking nose.
Naturally, I return the favor, twice.
He then passes out while I am getting a paper towel and mopping up the blood.
Of course my glasses cut my nose too, ya gotta love those Made In China motherfuckers from the Dollar store, they are sitting on my broken nose as I type, they are fine.
Never a dull moment.

I kinda lost count but I think this is the eighth or ninth time my fucking nose has been broken.It is eight O'clock in the morning and I am going to go wake that bastard up and buy him breakfast, the fucker anyway.
If ya don't hear anything outta me in the near future.......


No, he doesn't remember a fucking thing, just as I thought.
Been there done that.
He woke up wondering why his mouth hurt and couldn't find his glasses, they were on the table over here.
He apologized several times.
Shit happens, I most certainly am not going to hold a grudge, he is a really nice guy, I just gotta remember not to give him hard alcohol.
Some folks are like that.

He said he was glad that he didn't kill me, that's two of us.


  1. Wow. And all I did was read the fun sections of the Sunday New York Times, then go to Trader Joe's and the Shop-Rite. And now I'm considering making a big pot of chicken soup and taking a nap. You have all the fun. :-)

  2. Man, sorry about the nose, but that is a great story. Brings back memories. Ahhh...

  3. dood

    at least your glasses didn't break

  4. Shit man ya shuda ducked!

  5. Y'all is some funny motherfuckers.Apparently you haven't had yer nose broken lately and can't remember just how much fun that is.

  6. next time, lace his drink with seltzer instead

  7. Geez Busted seems no good deed goes unpunished.
    I knew there was a reason I quit drinking many years ago. Some guy did that to me once.

  8. Anonymous1:02 PM

    You got some fucked up friends man.

  9. Were you listening to opera by any chance?

    Just wonderin'!

    Heal up and be wary of that guy from now on, Busted.

    And look for another neighbor friend.


  10. He busted your hooter? Well, if he doesn't remember shit after a tipple, go for a round two knockout, dress him up in a Pippi Longstocking outfit and leave his crumpled ass spectacling at an I-5 turnout.
    Let's see the drunk fuck try to explain that to himself.