Thursday, June 03, 2010

There Is A Special Level Of Hell Awaiting Mechanical Design Engineers.

I have been dealing with these fucking idiots for over thirty years and to this day, I can say, just because it looks good on paper, does not mean it is a good design.
How many nightmares I have dealt with over the years runs into the thousands, I have spent a great deal of my professional time out smarting engineers who design one fucking component that goes into a car that is so fucked up trying to repair it in said car, requires disassembling half the motherfucker to get to one goddamn screw.

It's called serviceability.

I just witnessed this today watching them fuck around trying to plug that giant oil leak in the gulf.

Off and on, I was watching one of those remote robot things, twice, trying to remove fouled cables dangling all over the fucking pieces of equipment they had dangling down in the ocean, at a mile deep.

Hey, asshole. why are there fucking wild cables getting caught up in some REALLY expensive pieces of equipment during a global emergency?
Never heard of duct tape?
How about Zip Ties?
Jesus, what a fucking exasperating thing to watch as some poor fucking bastard is trying to use a remote vehicle with mechanical fingers try and untangle that shit while the whole mess is bobbing up and down due to wave action a mile up above and the whole mess is swinging back and forth like a fucking hypnotists watch.
One suggestion, pay the fuck attention to fucking cables and lanyards and shit like that that could get in the way BEFORE the fucking thing is a goddamn mile down in the drink.

I actually saw one remote get tangled up and while trying to get loose, some , I"m sure, critical piece got tore the fuck off and went to the bottom.
How do I know it was a critical piece?

Another clue was who ever was operating it kept using the camera to see what just went missing.

If these are the best engineers that BP can find, we are SO FUCKED!
no fucking wonder they can't fix this.

Hey, I have an idea, if you can find a decent crane operator, send down a fucking piece of pipe that is tapered to fit inside the broken one and gets big enough to get stuck in the fucker, a mile of pipe is pretty fucking heavy.
Slide it in and stick it until it stops and then start pumping oil.

Damn, I am just a red neck mechanic and I can figure this shit out.
That would give you assholes enough time to drill those other wells and I could get a Medal of Honor.

Fucking morons.