Friday, January 07, 2011

Reality Tee Vee I Can Get Behind

Enough of this Dancing with the Stars bullshit, no more Survivors either.

Now you can have your kids have a dose of reality, this is where your food comes from.

Just in case your meat guilt wasn't powerful enough, here comes Kill It, Cook It, Eat It, a BBC show premiering in America January 11th at 7 p.m. on Current TV. Each episode, volunteers will head out to the farm to meet, care for, and then slaughter and eat a wide variety of tasty creatures.

I don't know about anyone else but I sure as fuck don't have any " meat guilt".

I like tasty dead animal parts.

I used to laugh when I grossed out the poor little honey at the local mini mart when I would go in and order some dead chicken parts. (Hot wings)

People today are so removed from the actual processes of what it takes to put an order of hot Wings or Pork Chops on their dinner table. I think this is a great idea.

I saw a report a few months ago from Brittan that the kids over there couldn't even identify a fucking tomato, I was shocked. Dumbfounded.

How could a kid get to be eight fucking years old and not know what a fucking tomato looked like?

Somebody's Momma needs an ass beating.

Slaughtering animals for food is messy, stinks like hell and is not pretty by any means. It is also what humans have done for thousands of years.
They also taught their children , up until recently.

Plucking a wet chicken is enough to gag the strongest stomach but if you want fried chicken for Sunday dinner, you better get after it.

I remember my Granny going out back behind the house and randomly grabbing the nearest chicken and start swinging it around until the body flew off and she had the head in her hands. I think I was about six years old. The fucking chicken got up and ran under the shed. Granny told me to crawl under there and get that chicken if I wanted supper.

Let me tell ya, I had never seen anything like that and I haven't forgotten it forty five years later.

I was scared to death but Granny wasn't taking no for an answer.

Under the shed I went, crawling through chicken blood and spider webs.

I grabbed the sonofabitch and drug it out and handed it to Granny.

She just looked at me and said, Come with me boy.

Now you know how I can tell you plucking a wet chicken can make ya puke.

God, how I miss that woman.

So, it is going to come back to this here shortly, we are already well on our way.

Might as well get a head start and watch it on Tee Vee to get an idea if you don't already know, at least it won't stink.

Make sure yer kids watch it too, Hard scrabble old grannies who lived through the Depression are few and far between now and couldn't catch a chicken if they wanted to.


  1. Went through about the same thing, minus the crawling under the shed, and with a great aunt. Shocking, yes, but I swear that was the tastiest chicken I ever ate. Doing (or helping with) the work is better than salt and pepper, as far as adding flavor and appreciation.

  2. Lockwood! My man, thanks for stopping by!

    I love your site dood.

    Thanks for reminding me, I need to get my narrow ass over there.

  3. Meat is murder. Mmmm, tasty, tasty murder.
    Yep, people will soon have to figure this shit out. Even those who would love to eat some meat won't have the slightest idea how to get it on the table if they can't buy it from a store.

    Last year, visiting a place that was vegetarian was pretty hard on me. They were ok with fish but unfortunately never served any. They had a sign stating "We don't eat anything with legs". I was about to ask if baby seals would be ok ('cuz flippers are not really legs) but a wave of politeness came out of nowhere on me and I just kept my yap shut.

  4. I have a daughter like that.She is a good girl and I love her dearly.
    I actually had Tofu chili and it was good.

    Fuck it, order a pizza.

  5. So, dead chickens runnin round with their heads cut off?

    What part if life or politics or reality is that different from?


    I'd say, it's all in the seasonings.

    N from what I recall, yer still learnin how to cook.

    Bless that woman who loves ya. Maybe SHE can help ya . . . lord knows my recipes and links have tried ta.


  6. hey busted.... my granny with an axe in the yard. scared the crap outta me when that forker jumped up and started running around. granny just patiently waited for it to pump out and fall over.

    i remember that a lot more than the plucking. all i remember of that was her dipping the hen in boiling water so the feathers would come off easier

  7. Hence that wet, disgusting chicken smell. Sure was good when she got done frying that sucker up though.

    Nothing like that and the gravy too.

  8. Sunfighter8:13 AM

    I remember the first time I saw one of my kin take a chicken and whack it's head off with a hatchet.

    She didn't do the break it's neck by swinging thing, just put it on wood block and whacked it's head off.

    I still remember that tasty chicken dinner after 50 years...

  9. Whether to chop its head off or wring its neck is simply a matter of style.

    Nucks, yer granny was fuckin' with ya to teach you a lesson about where food comes from. She coulda offed it without its body flying off. Under the shed was a nice touch. Heh.

    As far as pluckin' 'em, a business partner of my Dad's, Scott McKendree of Klamath Falls, invented an attachment for an electric drill. In various sizes for different kinds of poultry and fowl. Google up 'McKendree Duck Picker'.

  10. Hi Busted,

    Damn but you can write! I'm envious.


  11. i was on a survival course in Oz-Australia-back in the 70s(aircrew survival)and by day 3 we were all pretty damn hungry. Then they tossed a few chickens in some boiling water to cook them, but did not, except for gutting, do anything else. Then they pulled out the chickens, with heads and feet and feathers still on and told us go ahead and eat.I was hungry and dove right in(I had helped a cousin kill and clean about 20 chickens when I was 8)pulled the feathers off and had an entire chicken to myself as several of the others not only refused to eat, but some even threw up. When you are hungry enough you will wat whatever. Rice beatles, grass hoppers, ants. Whatever is necessary to stay alive. At least some of us who are somewhat undercivilized will. BTW, I still remember my cousin tying 3 chickens at a time by 1 leg up in the air and cutting their heads off with a sharp knife(mine) and letting them bleed out

  12. If you have not heard of Mike the Headless Chicken you should go take a look.

    Good story. We used to butcher a bunch at a time with neighbor helping neighbor.

  13. Anonymous9:15 AM

    "We used to butcher a bunch at a time with neighbor helping neighbor."

    That was a regular event at a neighbor's house - all the kids gathered up and the neighbor whacked chicken heads and the running and jumping and pumping headless birds was all mixed up with the bunch of kids running and jumping trying to catch 'em. It was considered a bragging point to get sprayed a little. Boy howdy does chicken feathers stink when dipped and re-dipped in that boiling water.
    That was sure fun! Thanks for reminding me of the memory.

  14. I have raised, slaughtered, and butchered my own meat - chicken and lamb, primarily. I have helped catch and clean fish and clean waterfowl that my father hunted.

    That I no longer do so is my choice, but I feel I have the right to MAKE that choice because I DO know where the meat in the nice, tidy tray comes from and have no illusions as to how it got there.

    I don't let my son harbor illusions, either - I refer to cows as hamburger on the hoof and chickens as future nuggets or soup-to-be.

    I wish more folks were truly AWARE of where their food came from - I think there'd be a sort of revolution if they did, one hopes for the better.

    Shade and Sweetwater,
    K (whose Evil Genius has picked and eaten peas fresh from the plant, noshed on sun-warm cucumbers, and has a firm grasp on what it means to eat no need to bitch-slap HER!!)