Friday, April 17, 2009

Asswipe

For once I am not going after some right wing butt muncher.
I am talking about toilet paper, seriously.

If ya have peoples of the female persuasion, I would recommend buying a semi trailer load of the stuff.
I remember being amazed at how many rolls of toilet paper my household went through in two weeks when I had the girlfriend and a young daughter that had not even hit ten years old yet.
Those cute little four packs went bye bye in a blur.
When I helped out the neighbor after he messed up his knee, his wife started to thank me for the food and then her eyes lit up and she really thanked me for the toilet paper I gave them.

The local newspaper is seventy five cents a copy now.
A four pack of asswipe is a buck at the dollar store and ya don't have to worry about smearing ink all over yer ass. Hire a trucker and get a trailer full.

I have wiped my ass with leaves before out in the boonies, take my word for it, a few hundred rolls of real toilet paper is worth it's weight in gold.

5 comments:

  1. cottenelle - soft, absorbent and no fuzz left behind.

    my ass is worth it - no more cheap stuff - lasts longer too cause ya don't have to use as much to do the job

    ReplyDelete
  2. Give toilet paper, it's a blessing.

    25 Cents a roll for two ply is a hell of a deal.

    It don't come that cheap down here.

    Damn I recall poopin in the woods when I was packing the Sierra's . . . . we took the roll out of the middle of it to save space.

    But once yer out of TP, yer at the mercy of mama nature to wipe. And that's more n most of us likely need to recall.

    Here's to Porcelain Thrones. *G*

    Life is the shitz?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Careful which leaves ya use for your bidness.

    Leaves of three, leave 'em be!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Soybean leaves are real soft damn near like the real thing.

    Newspapers need to change as they're much too harsh.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yeah, and don't use paper towels if you run out of TP- you remember my terlet episodes, doncha, busted?

    ReplyDelete