Thursday, April 30, 2009

Bravo!

Nunya has got it going on!

I just love a snarky post but she threw up the links to make her point in a beautiful way.

Good on ya honey!

Go visit PolitickyBitch.

Yeah, yeah, I love the name too, what can I say?

Another Day In The Life, RV Style

Things are getting ugly here in the White Trash Trailer Park.

No beer, no smokes, some with little food and folks are rolling up cigarette butts.

Even the lady across the street was seriously interested in the garden.
I Googled the frost date around here and it is now a fifty-fifty chance of anything you put out freezing.

I hate waiting because I see my Strawberries flowering but my onions are just kind of hanging in there, the Taters are trying to do something.

I decided to get my head out of my ass and see if my 12 volt water pump works.
This thing must have a fairly good sized fresh water tank because I stood there for a long time with a hose.
I opened up the drain and started flushing it out and then poured a bunch of Bleach in it and shut the drain off and still stood there with my thumb in my ass.
The geniuses who designed the inlet made it big enough to stick a hose all the way in without a nozzle.

I finally got sprayed when it was full and opened the drain back up.
The 12 volt water pump works just fine, lucky me, I have an extra one.
If you live full time in an RV, get ya another one as soon as possible.

Packing water of an unknown quality to dump in your fresh water tank is not something I want to gamble on, I would give you three to five odds that something bad would happen.

One of the neighbors yelled through the door that I had water running all over the place.
Nice guy to be looking out for my ass.
I yelled back that it was on purpose.
Now that I have killed any single celled varmints in the fresh water system, I can refill the tank for good measure.

I flushed everything with the Bleach water, even the toilet.

On to the next subject,

Hot water is a very nice thing.
Something I am going to look into is getting a very large propane tank and hooking it up.

I see this place is as expensive as a Box Car to keep heated and cooled, just about Ninety Bucks a month for the Zap Juice and I don't know how much yet for Propane, going on sixty Dinero's.

That is WAY too much.
Something to work on, cutting my energy expenses.
One thing at a time.

I can't wait for it to get hot around here, this thing is going to turn into a giant oven when it does.

I actually did the dishes again tonight, I am going to find a rectal thermometer, something ain't right, I must be sick again.

Of course, I still have a weeks worth of laundry fermenting.

I must not be too well yet.

Thanks fer stopping by.

Oh, and the Swine Flu and the Politics?
Ummm, I seem to have other things more immediate to deal with.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Just A Quick Tip

In these trying economic times, record numbers of people are opting to drive without car insurance, that can be understandable, to a point.
The other thing that no one thinks about is having to put tabs on your car on a regular basis.
I have seen a serious uptick in current year tabs on our equipment come up missing.
Here is how to cure that.
When you put the new tabs on your plates, take a razor or a sharp knife and cut an X across the tab.
Then they can't just peel it off and put it on their car without considerable difficulty.

Cross posted at Fixer and Gordons.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Bustedus Domesticus; Shoot Me Now

Oh the fun I have had tonight.

As you may know, I have been slowly getting moved into this trailer for a while now, heavy emphasis on slowly.

After my weekend long bender, I decided to sober up a bit and start taking care of business.

My friend Suzanne came and helped me out a ton last weekend and got me pointed in the right direction but then I got a wild hair up my ass and nothing else got done.
I found a cool vacuum cleaner and some extra bags and finally got one to fit right and did a couple of cursory passes, uhm, yeah, I filled the joint up with dust is more like it.

So tonight I figured I would get with the program a bit.

Let me tell you about how this worked out.

Suzanne told me the best way to go about cleaning and organizing is to start in a corner of one room and work your way out and just repeat the process.

I ain't that fucking smart.

The first thing I did was to go around dumping half empty beer cans and ashtrays, then I got rid of the evidence from the last week, all the empty jugs.

All good and well, progress, ya know.

I took out the garbage, then I tripped over the vacuum cleaner. When this thing was new, it was an expensive sonofabitch.

Kind of like a cannister type on wheels with more damn attachments than I know what to do with, a huge remote agitator unit that is remotely powered up through the hose, everything plugs in and is electric.
So, I crack a beer and hook this thing up and turn it on.
Grumpy Old Woman Cat bangs her head on the wall getting the fuck out of Dodge.
Why is it that this cat can tell the difference between Judas Priest and a fucking vacuum cleaner?

Anyway.
I am going to town with this thing and the next thing I know, it gets real dark all of a sudden.

I look behind me and see the Dustbowl from Kansas behind me.

Shit.
Of course I never put away the clean dishes that Suzanne was so kind to do and now they look like Terra Cotta.

The fucking carpet looks like a freshly unearthed Woolly Mammoth carcass to begin with and now all I am doing is spreading some seriously nasty shit around, with a brand new bag in the thing.

I turn the damn thing off and open the door to air the joint out and here comes the other cat.
Dude!
I like what you are doing to the place.
I see you have a beer open so I am going to go shed seventeen fucking pounds of cat hair behind the stereo you haven't hooked up yet because I know you won't find it for another month.
By the way, feed me man!

Little fucker.


I change the damn bag, it was full, surprise, and remember Suzanne told me to spread Baking Soda on the carpet.
Have I mentioned Suzanne is the shit?

So I break it out and start sprinkling it around and then it just dumped half the motherfucking box out in one spot.

Time out, my beer is getting warm.
I smoke a cigarette and mutter under my breath, the whole time knowing I have a kitchen full of dirty dishes.

I get the damn mess cleaned up in the kitchen and then go to mow the bathroom.
That's right, there is carpeting in the kitchen, the bathroom and every square inch of flooring in this thing.

Who the FUCK puts carpeting in a bathroom?

Idiots.

I filled up another bag and called it good.

I am going to have to rent a cleaner, I also went through half a bottle of Fabreze.
Somebody before me had cats and I swear half of what I vacuumed up was cat hair of a different color.
Another beer and I had to come up to the nightstand to get a pack of smokes.
The old bitch bit me again, out of the blue.
She must really hate vacuum cleaners.

I can tell you she doesn't care for flying lessons much either, sonofabitch.


On to the dishes!
YAY!
My fucking favorite.

There is a really old mechanic joke,

How can you tell a mechanic has been on a date?
He has one clean finger.

How can you tell Busted has been doing dishes?
All his fingernails are clean.

I redid all the ones that Suzanne did,then everything else, after I went and got two bottles of Propane and relit the Hot water heater.
Now I see why I go through so much propane, the hot water heater sounds like an F-15.
That thing literally roars when it is going.

I had put my cast Iron pans in the sink because they were ,um, needing a soak can I say?

I had to scrub the shit out of them and then of course, you have to re-season them.
Lucky for me, I had some Pepper Bacon in the fridge that I can pretty much guarantee was Swine Flu free, if not Salmonella.

Did you know that the engineers who designed the little gas stoves in trailers had a wicked sense of humor?
They did.
They actually put a mark on the burner controls that says medium.

Ha Ha.
Fuckers.
They are either on or off, High or pilot light, bitches.

I had three cast iron pans with bacon scorching in them at the same time.

OFF.
Beer, cigarette, repeat.

Before the first one of ya suggests I was drunk because I had a couple of beers, let me remind you that this episode took three hours and after drinking straight whiskey for three days, a couple of beers here and there is like drinking soda pop.
There ain't much room to turn sideways in one of these things when there isn't shit stacked up all over as it is and they have shit for counter space.


I finally got the bacon under control and since I haven't eaten anything real solid for three days, I decided to fry up some eggs and make some toast and call it a day.
The first motherfucking thing I did was knock a half a dozen eggs off the counter while wrestling with the big cast iron pan.
Where do you think they landed and broke all over?
The carpet, in the kitchen, that I had just vacuumed.

I think I will just go piss all over the bathroom carpet and be done with it.

Monday, April 27, 2009

It's That Time Again

Because I have been a Judas Priest fan for thirty years now,



Oh, CRACK MY ASS UP!!

The Grumpy Old Woman Cat is having a fit!
She is rubbing her face all over my keyboard where the speakers are and trying to chew on the damn cables!
ROTFLMAO!

Who knew?
I have a Head Banger Kitty!!

The Silver Lining To The Swine Flu

Go buy a freezer.


MMMMMM,Cheap bacon.

I will be all over that, if I ain't dead.

Thank you Fark.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

This Is the Deal

Yadda Yadda Yadda, Torture.

Shut your fucking mouth, it is absolutely illegal, immoral and a hideous fucking thing to even have to contemplate that our government did this horrendous shit.

Line 'em up and prosecute 'em.

Shut the HELL up and do it.


PS,
You fucking cocksuckers that kept yellin' that I was a traitor during the Bush Administration?

Save me the trouble and go run head first into a brick wall, twice.

My Achin' Ass!

A two day run away drunk,Waking up on a couch some fucking place , The laptop telling me, FUCK YOU DUDE, and what the fuck ever.
My friend Suzanne drove over and we had a good time Just sitting and bullshitting, it was nice.
We went and had some Chinese food and just plain had a good time, she is the shit.
Can you say comfortable?
That shit is far and few between.

OK, the POS had some kind of issue and It just locked up.
My bad, I downloaded some fucking Anti Virus shit and it killed the memory limit.
Then I went on a fucking tear for two fucking days and low and behold, no update.

From what I hear, I can be expecting death threats from a certain little hotties boyfriend,
when he gets out of jail.

I danced all by myself for an hour like no one was looking, then I snagged another little hottie out on the sidewalk and went to town with the nasty dancing and the sweetie actually told me that I had it going on!Sweet little thing.

WTF?
I know how to have a good time!

Nothing like that kind of shit to make an old man look forward to waking up one more time.

All that shit and more than I can remember, because I can't.
Oh yeah, I went and got the Mountain Man face cleaned off, I actually look like your average, everyday, Ornery Fucking Bastard.
It was pretty much out of control and Yippeee Kay Yay!
Ouch.
Lock up yer womens.
BWAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!


The Strawberies are blooming.
Thanks for stopping by.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Adios Amigo

In one of those kick you in the face moments, I got off work and went to the local watering hole and was informed that an old friend had passed away today.
Before anyone gets all excited, Fred and I were Hi, how ya doing friends, for about fifteen years.
We shook hands and said howdy last week.
We had a mutual affection because we could each see a decent human being just by looking each other in the eye.
I went to his wife's funeral over ten years ago, both of them were some of the nicest people you could ever want to meet.
I used to get the biggest kick out of them, they would come into the bar that they actually used to own, on Sunday, and order breakfast and they would each break out a paper back book and just sit there in the booth by the front window and read while they ate.

I have wonderful memories of them both and his kids and me are friends too.

My sincerest condolences.


Yeah, I know, the older ya get , the more ya get to practice the funeral thing.
No one gets out of here alive.
One of these days I am going to be worm food too.

Anyway, here is to Fred Morales, a very good man.
You are already missed.

Bonus, I just found out the Eagles are going to have a memorial for him on Cinco De Mayo.

Bet yer ass I will be there

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Time Out

I had to go to my Granddaughters fourth birthday party tonight.
I am busy recalibrating my cute meter, it pegged and bent the needle.
Back tomorrow.

Monday, April 20, 2009

So, How Is That FISA Thing Working For Ya?

Naw, our government doesn't have the capability to spy on you, what?
yer just fucking paranoid.
Trust the government, if you are a fucking idiot.

If this does not tell you just how far the surveillance goes in this country, you just might want to start running Red Lights for entertainment.

Think about what you just read, two FBI Agents had access to surveillance cameras, in a fucking dressing room, in a little fucking shop, in a mall, in Bum Fuck Egypt.

Now you just might get a clue of why Myself and several hundred thousand other people have been up in arms about the illegal wiretapping and just how far these motherfuckers can go to intrude into our lives.
A dressing room in a fucking mall?

I need new drapes.

Of course, I already know these fuckers have evidence of what a degenerate mother fucker I am, they have been watching my sick little ass for quite a while.

I gotta say though, this surveillance shit goes way the fuck beyond my wildest tin foil nightmares.

No wonder no one in the government wants this stopped, can you begin to imagine what these people talk about over coffee in the morning?

Bonus Round, they have been charged with misdemeanors, no Donkeys were involved crossing over State lines.



H/T Those other sick fuckers at Fark, ya gotta love 'em.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

So, According To The New President, No One Should Be Prosecuted For Torture?

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Just Fer Shits And Gigggles

I flipped the Blogroll upside down for something to do.
Ya might want to check some of them out that have been at the bottom.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Git Yer Butt Over Here

Lordy, this outfit is doing some yeoman's work in digging through the bullshit that the Main Stream News is putting out every damn day.

Good on ya Blue Girl!

It's Official

I have way too much crap.

I spent the better part of the day trying to put stuff away and I was completely foiled.
I still have the back of my old truck full of shit and there is no damn way all that is coming in here, there ain't anywhere to put it!.
Tomorrow, I am backing a pickup right in front of the door and shit is going to start flying.
Look out kitties.
I have more damn clothes than a man should be allowed to own legally.


That is going to change.
I still have no clue where to put all my cookware, my friend Suzanne is coming to kick me in the ass and show me how it is done.
God Bless Her Heart, I tried to call her and disabuse her of the notion but she will not be deterred.

The thing is, I don't buy clothes, I get 'em for free all the time because apparently all these women folk think I am destitute because everything I own looks like it has been through a war.
Grease on everything, ripped, torn and abused.
Hello?

I am a mechanic.

Shit happens.

HMMM, it will take her a while to get here, that gives me some time to get my ass to the laundromat and clean out the cat box.
Little fuckers shit more than they eat, I swear to God.

I am currently incinerating some dead chicken parts on the gas grill the guy left behind.
Now I see why he left it.
I don't think the flames are supposed to come up behind the control knobs, what a fucking disaster.
I think I have it under control but there are a couple of thighs that I don't even think the cats are going to want.

I shoulda stuck with the old charcoal sumbitch, it works as advertised.

What the hell, I have gloves and pliers, just cook the dead chicken parts without blowing the place up and I will be happy.

If not, Kentucky Fried Dead Chicken Parts is right around the corner.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Asswipe

For once I am not going after some right wing butt muncher.
I am talking about toilet paper, seriously.

If ya have peoples of the female persuasion, I would recommend buying a semi trailer load of the stuff.
I remember being amazed at how many rolls of toilet paper my household went through in two weeks when I had the girlfriend and a young daughter that had not even hit ten years old yet.
Those cute little four packs went bye bye in a blur.
When I helped out the neighbor after he messed up his knee, his wife started to thank me for the food and then her eyes lit up and she really thanked me for the toilet paper I gave them.

The local newspaper is seventy five cents a copy now.
A four pack of asswipe is a buck at the dollar store and ya don't have to worry about smearing ink all over yer ass. Hire a trucker and get a trailer full.

I have wiped my ass with leaves before out in the boonies, take my word for it, a few hundred rolls of real toilet paper is worth it's weight in gold.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Whattya Do?

I been busting my ass at work lately, try to take care of some personal shit and a few neighbors after that and then fall down to get up and do it again.
I also have my oldest buddy getting a good dose of the current foreclosure wave and am trying to hook him up with another good friend so he can get a truck, even though he has no clue of where he is going to wind up at yet.

I got off work today and stopped and had a fucking cocktail to relax for a few minutes and then came home and started digging up one of the garden spots because it was actually nice out.
I probably dug up a bout a pound of little red potatoes and a couple of Russets, not to mention a couple of fifty pound boulders and a buttload of fist sized rocks.
All these potatoes are volunteers from the guy that moved out from the garden he had two years ago, he didn't do shit in the garden last year and I have enough of them sprouting that I was digging them up to replant when a bunch of the rowdier neighbors showed up looking for a drink and some Neighborly love,yay team.

Just to top it off, I got drunk called by a sister duo I have known forever and that was really interesting...


Never a dull moment, I don't have time to rant and rave anymore, I can't even keep up with the fucking news, let alone cruise my favorite sites.
This POS antique laptop is trying to take a shit, I am having a lot of problems with the keyboard and if I don't cough up a bunch of dough tomorrow, my internet connection is going bye bye.
All in good time, I will pay that tomorrow.

I guess it doesn't matter, We The People ,are still taking it up the ass and I am damn happy I have potatoes coming up that I didn't even plant.
There were a bunch of them sprouting so I dug a few holes and replanted about ten of 'em before I got interrupted.

I'm trying here....

Thanks for stopping by.

Update;

I gave Verizon their filthy lucre so if I can keep that piece of shit laptop going I will still be posting, how often I can't say, my muse is a drunken bitch.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Too Busy To Wipe My Ass

Go torture my buddy PhysioProf, apparently he has too much time on his hands.
Twitter, give me a fucking break, I don't even text unless it is family and even then it is irritating to no end.Delete is a handy little item.
He has an interesting conversation going on, Take a minute.

People, Morse code was developed in the 1800's fer fucks sake.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Tick Tock.

I don't know how to put this in a delicate way because I have been here before.

Bad things are happening down here in the trenches.

There aren't any multi million bonuses traveling through this White trash trailer park.

Back to this fucked up economy, I told ya about the kid next door. I have another guy who is a very nice guy on the other side who can't get a job and I see is having big trouble .

My Mothers Parents went through the first Depression and helped raise me, and my brother, and a whole nother family, on basically what they grew and canned out of their garden and the awesemnous of their hearts.
They had been there and done that and they knew what misery and hunger was.

Not only was I lucky enough that I learned empathy from them, I also learned how to give .

My other Grandparents reinforced that to armor plate, they also gave until it hurt and my Grandmother is still a huge influence in my life. If she was smart, she would put out a contract on my ass.
I owe her big time.

These are hard times and what was my Granny was trying to tell me when I got tired of shucking peas and peeling peaches for canning?


Two weeks from now, ya might have a nice dinner,
or as my dear departed Grandmother used to say, "it will make a turd".

How do you argue with that?

I really don't know what I am trying to say here except the shit is hitting the fan down here in this neck of the woods and I am doing what I can to help my neighbors, just like I was helped my whole entire life, and still am, and I was taught by example.
I know my family would help me in a heartbeat, I am trying to keep my shit together, most folks out there ARE the folks!
When ya give a guy a ride to work in the morning and you can here his belly rumbling but he is too proud to take a fucking banana, ya know you have found the rock bottom of this economy and you are damn right, we shall take care of those around us and those mother fuckers squealing that they have to have a multi million dollar bonus for driving their company into the ground will never get the offer of a banana for breakfast, in the face of working their fucking ass off, waiting for five o'clock ,so they can go home and wonder what the fuck they are going to have for dinner.Those fuckers will get what is coming to them in the end, even if it is death by bleeding ulcer or being run over by the high maintenance bitch in their leased Ferrari who just found out her credit card just went bye bye.

I have a real hard on for this trillion dollar give away.

I might not have much but I will be damned if I am going to watch my neighbor or his kids go hungry if I can help it.
Community is a real thing here, all for one and one for all, bring on a pot of beans and make a turd for tomorrow.

It is happening here and Wall Street can choke on their bonuses, no banana for you.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Why Don't You Use Our Poison On Your Garden First Lady?

Seriously.
This is off the charts idiocy and lobbying run amok.
This blindingly stupid chemical outfit is "disturbed" that the First Lady is trying to grow an organic garden without using their poisonous products to, I don't know, kill things.
They even had the brass to send a letter stating this .



I personally am thrilled that Michelle Obama has put in a garden at the Whitehouse, thrilled.
Why?
Because it is a great example to the average American that if you have some space, it is not that hard to grow some basic vegetables to help save money on your grocery bill and help yourself to be a bit more self sufficient at the same time, without having to resort to using poisonous chemicals in the process.

Someone else is having a hard time that she is doing it organically.

Normally I don't just cut and paste things because I believe in giving an original author the benefit of linking to their original piece because they are the one that worked to put it out in the first place and they deserve the respect to have you go read the whole thing where it was published.
Once in a while, that is not conducive to getting the point across, this is one of those times.

I will provide the link, believe me, I am incensed enough that I want this message to get out, there will be a link to voice your personal message to these ,um, people.

Here is the text of the message and the link to respond will follow, I urge you to send your own personal message as you see fit.


The Mid America CropLife Association (MACA) has a bone to pick with Michelle Obama.

MACA represents chemical companies that produce pesticides, and they are angry that - wait for it - Michelle Obama isn't using chemicals in her organic garden at the White House.

We are not making this up.

In an email they forwarded to their supporters, a MACA spokesman wrote, "While a garden is a great idea, the thought of it being organic made [us] shudder." MACA went on to publish a letter it had sent to the First Lady asking her to consider using chemicals -- or what they call "crop protection products" -- in her garden.

Michelle Obama and has done America a great service by publicizing the importance of nutritious food for kids (she's growing the garden in partnership with a local elementary school class) as well as locally grown produce as an important, environmentally sustainable food source.


Yes, this actually happened, yes, they are beneath my contempt.

I do not usually urge any kind of action on anyone's part around here, I am usually content to sit and pitch a fit.

However, at this time I am going to give you an opportunity to send a message decrying the use of "crop protection products" on the garden at the Whitehouse because it is unnecessary and the fact that companies like Monsanto are actively trying to physically control every aspect of the plant farming in this country in conjunction with the agricultural lobby and their questionable legal tactics and that is a threat to every human being on this planet.

The banking industry can disintegrate tomorrow, you cannot eat money.


I will not argue that there is not a need for fertilizer and pesticides in agriculture.
I will, however, argue that this country needs to get as organic as possible as soon as possible and that by trying to lobby the Whitehouse to start spraying the historic garden that has been put in is beyond just bad taste but a sign of Big Agra trying to bully the American public by going after the most high profile organic garden in history and deciding that it knows best.

I would point out the many instances of Salmonella poisoning that has become rampant in the last few years from produce brought about by Big Agra, but that would be unsporting.

If you would care to sign a petition informing the "Pesticide Peddlers" that you support the organic garden that the First Lady has been working on, you can do so here.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Never Underestimate The Power Of People Thinking About You


I have been kind of out of sorts for the last couple of days, no posts.

I had one of those lovely little visits from some tiny little varmint that you can't see, smell or hear that causes one to wake up in the middle of the night with your asshole clenched as tight as the knees on a second chance virgin at an after hour party on Prom night.

Something about trying to describe ones self pissing out of their ass for twelve hours straight leaves something to be desired, so I just shut off the computer for posting.
I think you can understand.

Other than that, life goes on.
There must be another disturbance in the force going on too.
I just spent two hours on a Friday night doing dishes.
That ain't normal for me.
It's all good though.
A younger man I used to work with and has been through the wringer has just bought the used trailer from the neighbors who paid ten grand for the one with the garage in the back. It is not real big but he is glad to have his own place.He is going to be my brand new neighbor, that is way cool.
I am glad he got it and I am going to go through this place and try to hook him up with the extra cook ware and dishes and assorted extras I have.

Win, win.

My oldest friend is in the middle of getting foreclosed on, he needs some serious help.
Ya don't have to be religious for a bit of positive thought to do it's thing.

I pretty much believe that.

Anyway, sorry I was so absent, I just figured I would spare you the details of what was happening with my alimentary canal.

Bonus round, I get to look forward to a phone call at eight thirty tomorrow and get up, go load a broke down fucked up old Ford truck on a trailer, drag it twenty miles and dismantle the fucking thing in one day, all the way to the frame.

Yay.

I can use some of the parts for The Beast.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Behind Before I Can Get Ahead, I Need To Catch Up

Holy shit what a mess.

About the only thing I can say that I got done after I got home was getting some cast iron pans cleaned out.
I still don't know where I am going to put 'em but they are clean and seasoned.
I can't believe what a sink full of dishes I get to play with, at least my finger nails are clean for ten minutes.

I did find that there are a few items I want to get to make life a little better.
A metric buttload of Onion powder, Garlic powder and three metric buttloads of Chili powder.
I still have ten little bottles of chili powder, that is my threshold, I am getting nervous.

Some things a feller just can't live without, I use that shit on everything, including scrambled eggs.

I still have a ton of cleaning and putting away in front of me, having Cast Iron pans that are ready to use is like a dose of Prozac in my world.

Keep after it, there is still a bunch of bad shit coming our way.

Thanks fer stopping by.

Monday, April 06, 2009

Home Sweet Home

Heh, I am such a Redneck.

I bailed out of my parents place shortly after they got home.
I already had one cat in the truck and was loading up the other one as they pulled in.
I gave mom a kiss and a hug and gave my dad a hug and was bailing out, it was rather hot out and I didn't want the cats to cook.
Pops told me to hold up, he had something for me and the next thing I know, he is digging around the back of the motor home and starts hauling out half gallons of whiskey, four of 'em!

Damn straight I will wait a minute!

So I threw them in the back and off I went, in the Beast.

I had had a couple of beers about an hour before they got there while I was packing shit in the truck and I was fine to drive but you might be a might alarmed to know that people like me exist when you least expect it.

I had two gallons of booze, a half rack of beer and two rifles in the gun rack,yes I have a gun rack in my truck, why do you ask?

I had two more rifles in the back, along with my pistol.
The truck is louder than hell, the power steering quit working, the front brakes pull to the right pretty good, the cab was full of crap and the bed was full of crap and I have one turn signal that really likes to stay on when I ain't looking and brake lights that work once in a while.

I do have insurance and the tags are good!

All this and bombing down the road at sixty miles an hour.
Whoo Hoo!
Get the hell out of the way kids!

Did I mention that I only have one cat carrier?

That means I also had one very unhappy cat traveling around randomly under the seat, on the dash everywhere except under the pedals, I kept grabbing it and throwing it on the passenger side.

I made it just fine and am laying here in the Weasel Den with one cat in, one cat out, a cold beer and a bottle of whiskey within reach.
I get to try out the shower here shortly, I just got done planting my onion sets.


The Beast is parked until I can get around to fixing some of that shit, brake lights are kind of a must anymore, dammit.
I know what is wrong, the turn signal switch is wore out, they want fifty bucks fer one of those damn things now!

Never a dull moment!

And you worry that I have no fun in my life, shame on you.

Sunday, April 05, 2009

I'm Alive

Today is the big day, I have to get my ass out of my parents place and go put my own place in order, like that will ever happen!

The Beast is completely full of my shit and soon I am going to throw a couple of fucking cats in it and get down the road.
Never a dull moment when it comes to my life.
Just for shits and grins, I am currently listening to an inspirational music list, of which this is at the top of the list.

I had a hell of a time finding this on Youtube, apparently the powers that be are scouring the net to get every unauthorized copy of this tune disabled.
Have a nice day, you fuckers, I bought this music, I have the CD in arms reach and this is a one fingered salute to you money grubbing cocksuckers.

Enjoy it while you can, they have unleashed the digital Hounds of Hell to keep this cash cow full of milk.

By the way, ignore the damn message window at the top, don't click on it.
Like I said, this the only copy I could find.


There is a message in the lyrics all of us preppers should take to heart.

Saturday, April 04, 2009

An Army Of Cough, Cough Cough.

Go see my Buddy Joe. Sure enough, this will piss ya off if you have been paying attention to the assholes giving our troops contaminated water to drink, electrocuting them while they are trying to cool off in the fucking shower, giving them substandard body armor and forbidding them to buy or be sent anything better.


Is it just me or does anyone else just want to kick somebody in the fucking nuts?

Friday, April 03, 2009

Some Advice If You Want To Buy A Used Travel Trailer

This is a public service announcement.

If you are thinking about buying a used Travel Trailer, whether it be a traditional tow behind or a fifth wheel, you will want to pay attention to what I am going to say here.

First off,

If you are not a certified Jack Of All Trades, you want to reconsider this decision right now.

Some skills you will be using constantly are,

Electrical trouble shooting, 110 volt and 12 volt both, they are two distinct different systems.

Travel trailers and Motor homes use both types of electricity, at the same time, and have a converter built in where the circuit breakers and fuses are located.
A great deal of the lighting , the electric water pump and possibly the refrigerator are generally on the 12 volt system while things like microwaves and the usual 110 volt outlets for televisions and other things are on a completely different system.
This is a complex system and you had best get a good grip on it as problems can get quite frustrating if the actual wiring is involved, tearing out wall panels is a real possibility, tracking down problems involving wiring is a real life nightmare in a real sense, every one of these things are glued and stapled together.

Next, this is important, if you have to take something apart, SAVE EVERYTHING!
There are so many fixtures, couplers , plumbing parts and things like light fixtures that you are going to go match up at the hardware store that you would be astounded.

Beware, these are RV specialty items and you are going to have to get real creative in trying to find a replacement.
Take my word for this, I have been trying to fix quite a few things in my trailer and they are not readily available at your local hardware store.

I spent an hour and a half trying to make a traditional porcelain toilet adapt to the plastic water lines that they use in these trailers.
There is nothing in the plumbing system in an RV that is the same as a house, as far as I have seen. The toilets and sinks are completely different.
Speaking of plumbing, get ready to deal with tiny little sinks.
That is one of my pet peeves, the kitchens are an after thought and the sinks are a joke.

There is no counter space in one of these things and ya better get ready for that right now.

The other things that you need to be aware of are water leaks.
These can be a deal breaker in the first place if there is one disclosed while buying and are the number one killers of RV's.

Water leaks do not happen all at once, like bumping a curb tends to throw the alignment off for your car.
Water leaks are very difficult to find and repair and cause terminal damage in some cases, way too often.

Things like air vents that are a stop gap measure to let heat out in the summer are especially notorious.
They are cheap pieces of junk with hand cranks that seem to be designed to destroy the very same workings that operate the lifting mechanism they were designed to operate.

Most of these contraptions have an air conditioning unit mounted on the roof to keep the occupants from frying like an egg in mid Summer, the electric bill will reflect the amount of heat directly, as will the propane furnace and water heater will in the Winter.

Again, these are proprietary units and will have no resemblance to anything that a stick house on the grid will have.

I swapped out the hot water heater in mine today.
That is a unique experience.

Things like Trailer brakes, tires that rot off the rims while sitting for long periods of times, wheel bearings are a huge maintenance item.
Take the time and expense to take the tires and brake drums off, take the wheel bearings completely out, replace the wheel bearings ,bearing races and pack the new bearings with a graphite based grease.
This is one of the most important maintenance items you can do and it does not cost a fortune.
It ain't cheap but two hundred bucks compared to a wheel falling off at sixty miles an hour with pretty much every thing you own inside that long box? Coupled to the Truck hooked to it and your kids?
Just do it.

To make this post short enough to read, I am going to stop here but just for grins, consider the waste water systems and the cost of repair and maintenance of those...
Do the math.
Trailers do a lot of sitting and wheel bearings will put you on the side of the road with a gaping hole in the side of your trailer in a heart beat.

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Updates From A White Trash Trailer Park Near You.

Another day of fun and games.

I found the bed, after putting away a small truckload of clothes and things that needed to be herded that way while moving.
You know, important stuff like three bricks of .22 shells, a new scope, two gun cleaning kits, with new brushes for the appropriate calibers,six boxes of .22 shorts, extra gun oil,a box of .30 .30 shells, extra cleaning patches and an alarm clock.
I'll be damned if I know where I am going to put all my socks now......

I dug out some clean bedding and made the bed and then went out and dumped a bunch of the boxes of garden dirt my Uncle had brought over, in between down pours.
I wasn't real happy after I dumped the third , fourth, fifth, sixth and seventh box, only to find out someone had used large styrofoam packing peanuts to fill in the grates in the bottom of the milk cartons to keep the dirt from falling through and then dumped over a couple more that had large pieces of broken plastic, nuts and bolts,screws, the cellophane wrappers off of cigarette packs and quite a bit of other garbage. It started raining again so I just left it where I dumped it.
I am going to have to wait until it all dries out to go picking through it all.

In the mean time, one of the neighbors had found a forty foot long fifth wheel and were unhooking the old one to move it in.
I don't know how they found it but they told me the guy wanted fifteen thousand bucks for it and they talked him down to ten.
Quite the deal.

The thing is, it is forty feet long, has some slide outs, but has a FOURTEEN FOOT GARAGE IN THE BACK!!

Criminy!

So the actual living space is not so big, but a built in garage?!!

I could deal with that.

I helped them unhook and move the old one, they parked it in the empty space where the Rat Hole used to be and then went and helped the guy back the new one all the way through the park, just like they had to do with mine.

This guy, I have to say, knew what the hell he was doing.
One shot to get it in the spot and one pull ahead to reposition it to fit where all the hook ups are, done.
That is pretty impressive.

So after all that excitement, I decided to take a nap.
I woke up at three thirty in the fucking morning last night for some reason and couldn't go back to sleep.
I finally got up and surfed the internet until six thirty, as it was getting light out.
Par for the course, the damn phone woke me up at nine thirty, just when I was snoozing hard.
I don't think I ever really got to 100% all day.

So I climb up in the front, ducking my head, and fall down on the bed just made, to take a snooze.

Laugh My Ass Off, if my fucking feet don't hang off the end of the bed.

This is going to be interesting.

Apparently this thing was designed for people under five foot seven, such a deal.
Seeings how I am just about six feet tall, this is a small problem.
I am every bit as long as this bed and then some.
I will deal with this in my usual, efficient, way.

There is a shelf at the head of the bed about six inches high and eight inches deep.
That is going to get stuffed with massive amounts of pillows, effectively lengthening the sleeping space.
I have to sleep with my head elevated anyway, something about Adenoids, my head plugs up and I can't breathe, been that way since I was a little kid.

So, the adventure continues, never a dull moment.

Oh yeah, I kept smelling gas, so did my buddy.
It finally dawned on me to open the damn door and then open the oven and light the pilot light in the bottom.
Details, details.


Update;

Crack my ass up!

Just for shits and grins I was checking my stats just now and found this.

Yo no habla Espanol Italiano but it cracked me up to see I was at the top of a search engine list in a foreign language!

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Ya Want Some Cheap Entertainment?

Turn off the fucking television and go park in front of the nearest WallGreens for about forty five minutes.
Make sure ya have the stereo turned up to Brain Melt for the maximum effect, ya get bonus points for the looks ya get while watching the entertainment walk in and out.
Double extra bonus points if ya have one of those "Park In Front" thingies to hang off the mirror.

That ought to cure ya of some boredom, They should make a reality show out of that shit.