Another Obituary I Am looking Forward To

Hard to believe this old woman is still around and that there is a single soul that wants to hear what she has to say, especially an all male school where she was the paid speaker.

"Don't Date Feminists"

– Phyllis Schlafly's advice to young men: Don't date feminists, even though "some of them are pretty." Speaking to an all-male student crowd at The Citadel college in South Carolina this week, the so-called "godmother of conservatism" also blamed feminists for drumming up the recent contraception flap in US politics, The Post and Courier reports. "Contraception is not controversial," said the 87-year-old. "The issue is not access. It’s who’s going to pay for it.”

Excuse me Granny, if you can't afford a fucking rubber, chances are your buddy will give you one.
Even better odds, the lady will have one herself, just in case you are a dumbass.

This old bitch has been flogging the "feminist" line since the 1960's.

Are you fucking kidding me? I'm getting old and was actually born in 1960, that is a lot of energy better spent on using contraceptives in my opinion. That one trick pony turned into kicking a dead horse a long fucking time ago too.


I find it extremely hard not to use my usual foul language here.
The words are right there on the tip of my tongue and they are the foulest ones in my repetouire.

Let me start with the fact that an 87 year old ,extremely conservative woman is giving a nice little chat about birth control to an all male graduating class.
Excuse me while I gag until my eyes bleed.

Come on Grandma, get the fuck out.

What I want to know is who is the aspirin between the knees little prude who thought this was necessary.

Really?
An 87 year old shrunken up old hag talking about birth control? Wait, it's about those dangerous fucking feminists that are damn near as old as she is.

Mission accomplished when you walked out on the stage, every swinging dick around just went turtle.

RUN FOR YOUR LIVES BOYS!!

You thought Cougars were out to rob you of your virile bodily fluids?
It's those hairy armpit nut busting feminists you need to worry about.
They are apparently too cheap to worry about contraceptives.
At least a decent Cougar would make sure you had breakfast before she patted you on the ass on your way out the door.


Phyllis Schlafly has been a dirty ----( can't understand normal thinking) for a long time and I would personally like to ----(beer in, beer out) in her mouth. No seminal fluids involved.
For the life of me, I cannot believe some fucking idiot thought it would be a good idea for her to talk about birth control to a sea of testosterone drenched young men.

Gag.

Hurry up and die you old bitch and make my fucking day.

Yesterday would be too late.

1984 Rules the World

Forget thought crime, this shit is getting serious, welcome to the future.
It's not bad enough the State can cruise through a parking lot and scan every license plate at fifteen miles an hour, or fifty, for that matter.

It's not bad enough that there are traffic camera's every where you turn, Arizona has them every half fucking mile in the middle of the fucking desert, Britain has them in bars where it is now Verbotten to wear a fucking hat or sun glasses because they demand to positively identify you sipping a motherfucking beer,they went so far as to outlaw real glass beer containers and real metal knives and forks two years ago in bars.
Now, George Orwell should be spinning about two thousand RPM in his grave, they took that concept and ran hard.

Now get this.

I can see prohibition Moonshiners circa two thousand fucking thirteen making a mint in Jolly Old England next year.

Really.

If you try to put gasoline in your car, at say, eight fucking dollars a gallon and the pump is connected to Big Brother, if you don't have car insurance, they will shut the pump off remotely.

I suppose some burly dudes in a big box van with machine guns won't be far behind to throw you on the ground to help you separate your shoulder with a knee in your neck and your elbow somewhere between you and the moon.

No fuel for you, ya piece of shit that is trying to get to work,a hospital,or God Forbid, an appointment with the motherfucking government.

Look for this to come to a fucking gas station near you soon.

When I was a kid, they gave you laundry soap, dishes, glasses or Green Stamps for doing business with them and checked your oil, cleaned your windshield and checked the air pressure in your tires just for doing business with them instead of the guy down the street. Now they are going to call the STASI on ya without lifting a finger.

Papers, Citizen?

35 And Counting

According to Think Progress, Rush Limbaugh has lost 35 advertisers so far after he called Ms. Luke a slut and a prostitute repeatedly last week.
I especially like this one;

JCPENNEY

"It has come to our attention that a handful of local radio stations may have played jcpenney radio spots adjacent to or during The Rush Limbaugh Show. To be clear, jcpenney is not a national advertiser of this show. We have a strict “No Run” policy in place specifically regarding The Rush Limbaugh Show.

After jcpenney confirms the facts, we will contact any local radio station that is in violation of our radio advertising parameters to ensure that our “No Run” policy is adhered to regarding this program." (via Facebook: http://thkpr.gs/Av7oq2)

Somebody is going to get fired for that.
Ol' JC been around a while.

I have no illusions that That fat fucking asshole is going to be taken off the air anytime soon but it is costing his employers money now and that is what they look at.

Of course, I never dreamed Glenn Beck would get starved out either but it really happened.

Keep up the pressure, I SOOOO want to see his fat hateful ass get thrown off of our Armed Forces Radio so bad I am fucking salivating.

I Won This Battle

The war is far from over but I finally kicked that Chevy in the nuts and Fordified it.

I got on the internets and found a few cheats from other guys who had gotten tired of fucking around and figured out how to re wire a Chevy starter and the Alternator too.

A few copy paste, send it to the wife so she could print out the schematics, five trips to the parts house because I couldn't get a grip on all the little fucking electrical connectors I needed and game on.

The inside of the engine compartment looks like a nightmare but it works and I can go back and redo a bit here and there at my leisure to make it pretty again.

At least I know what goes where now.

WTF, it starts, runs and drives again and if I ever, ever, find the crack head that butchered that wiring harness, I am going to beat him senseless with his liver and string him up and choke him to death with his intestines.

The fucking shit I ran into would make a mechanic drink until he was blind.

Two, 10 gauge heavy duty wires coming from the alternator back to the starter, wrapped together and connected to a 14 gauge wire, with electrical tape.

Think of two ropes connected to a shoe string trying to pick up a rock the size of your car.

That kind of shit everywhere.
EVERYWHERE!

Everywhere I started hunting down wires, I ran into bizarre shit like that and would have to go get more wire and the correct connectors.

I got it to start and run but I am going to spending a long time going through a bunch of wiring harness'es and a ton of new wires, new connectors, harness covers, tie straps and beer until I get this fucker straightened out and looking pretty again.

It is a testament to my mechanical ability I got the fucker running at all.

Run it does though.

BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!


Kiss my fucking ass.

I do have to admit, right now under the hood it looks like a spider on acid had a field day....

Fuck, REALLY?

Goddamit!
I fucking woke up at three fucking thirty in the morning last night, for no damn good reason and didn't go back to bed until seven, after several shots of whiskey.

Now I am up again at Oh Dark Thirty because some fucking ankle biter of a dog was barking it's fucking head off and I had to get up twice and open the back door to yell at the fucker to shut up.

The sonofabitch ain't in range for a good sling shot to the head either.
 A couple of doors away behind two fucking fences or it would be unconscience like I want to be right the fuck now.
 Apparently the cocksucker got the message finally.

Little motherfucker.

Of course, my dad is completely oblivious and I can hear him snoring away through the wall, God bless his heart.

Where is a fucking Ninja when ya need one?

Bring Out Yer Dead

Who would have thought that folks can't afford ten thousand dollar funerals any more?

According to the USA Today, the dead tree version of the news that is afforded to me gratis at the hotel I am currently burrowed into, the entire country has seen at least a ten percent increase in unclaimed bodies and funerals for indigent people.

Increasingly, counties are opting for cremations over burials because it is cheaper.

Just in case you didn't know, if you croak and are old enough to collect Social Security, the government will pay out a whopping $250 for your remains to be taken to the local land fill.

The last I heard, it costs a grand just to be cremated.

Ya might as well just have a couple of guys dragging a cart down the street yelling out "Bring out Your Dead" like they did back in Europe when the plague was in full bloom.

Eh, just leave me out for the vultures, when I'm dead, I won't give a fuck anyway.

This is just one more aspect of the Republican plan that seems to be working a little too well these days.

Are You Fucking Kidding Me?

My outrage meter has been pegged all day but now it is completely, absolutely, broken.

Catholic group claims children raped by priests were ‘homosexual’ participants, not victims

 

The anti-gay Catholic League for Religious and Civil Rights is going on the attack against "those who are distorting the truth about priestly sexual abuse."
The group bought an expensive full-page ad in The New York Times Monday that places the blames for the church's scandals on "homosexuality, not pedophilia."
And perhaps most shockingly, it also claimed that some children were active participants in the abuse.
"The refrain that child rape is a reality in the Church is twice wrong: let’s get it straight -- they weren’t children and they weren’t raped," self-appointed Catholic League president Bill Donohue wrote in the ad.

Uhmm, I am pretty much speechless.

Oh fuck no. I ain't either.

Listen up you rotten fucking bastard, you just made bile rise in my throat.
You need to be dragged down the middle of Main street by your intestines.
Sick, rotten, fuck, I can't even come up with the words,
apologistic dirty sonofabitch!

Are you fucking serious?



Really?
 That just came out of your fucking mouth?
The words just won't come!
Throat punch, that's all I can think of.

What a fucking ASSHOLE!
 I really, really can't say what is going through my mind right now.

Seventeen kinds of horrible death are what is going through my mind, you fucking bastard. Take three.
FUCK YOU!!
Yeah baby, those little boys just loved having a dick stuck up their asses, come here Padre, do me now.
Bitch slap in three, two, one.
Confession must have been like Penthouse Letters.


Donahue has been over the top for a long time but this  is just fucking criminal.

 

Do They Not Still Make Yardarms?

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He Didn't Say, Im Going To Disneyland!

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I'll Get You, My Little Pretties

Fucking ants.
God Damn, they are pissing me off.
I bombed this joint after the old woman cat took the long hike , twice.
The mother fucking fleas went the way of the dinosaur but the fucking ants keep coming back.
No, this isn't some little, "Oh my, there is an ant", the fucking cocksuckers keep running up my arm in my bed.
Little tiny fuckers.
That is enough to make me go "nooklear".
Yes, I take my garbage out regularly, yes I do my fucking dishes too.
That is where they came from, the drain. I have been killing these little mother fuckers for six months now but they have managed to find a home somewhere that I haven't  found yet
Jesus fucking Christ, what does it take to kill these little fuckers?
Fuck! If a chemical fog bomb can kill a flea, what the fuck is it going to take to kill these little bastard ants?
Stay tuned because I am going to find out, one way or another, they just pissed me the fuck off.